I am 32 years into a second marriage and I have found the man of my dreams. Wonder of wonders, it is my husband! He is kind, generous, loving, courageous and true. Now, I want you to know that I didn’t always feel this way, but then, I suppose that is true of any long-term relationship. The secret to a relationship to being long-term is . . . are you ready? Drum roll please . . . “Don’t leave!”
Since it is Valentine’s Day, it is a good time to reflect on love
First, I want to look at what true love is not!
- It is not feelings though they add to the good stuff. Feelings are fickle and subject to change.
- It is not sex like the television producers want us to believe – it is a perk in a committed relationship.
- It is not staying in a relationship where you or your children are being abused or terrorized.
- It is not being in “love with love” and having unrealistic expectations of another.
- It is avoiding strife and contention at all costs while not avoiding the issue!
What is true love?
- First and foremost, it is commitment to not turn and run in the difficult times.
- It is treating the loved one like you want to be treated.
- It is using a soft answer when the other is angry.
- It is serving the other.
- It is recognizing that this one person is not responsible for meeting all your needs.
I will end with this:
To Joe: I promise to love you all of our days, To be grateful for who you are and the gentle kindness of your personality, To love you even when I am disappointed, hurt and sad, To trust you when I don’t understand your thought process, To serve you even when I would rather do something else, To laugh with you and cry with you, To choose to do what you want to do, To understand that you and I are broken and that we don’t complete the broken-ness in each other, To trust the One who created us to fix us. I promise not to try to fix you. Thank you for your love and patience with me. Thank you for not running away in the early days of our marriage. Thank you for becoming the man of my dreams!